"Baby, I di'nt get dis way from livin' in a convent. Since I was 15, I been smokin'. Usin' tanning machines since '79. Drink a pint of whiskey every coupla days. Eat once a day, tacos and a Slim-Fast. Sex whenever I can afford a gigolo. And, shoot, sleep whenever I just can't go no mo'. Oh, and don' fergit the laxatives -- cain't do widout 'em anymo'."
Many Thanks to Funny Pictures