Please, Mommy

Mommy, it followed me home. Can I keep it. Please!

Many thanks to Eye of the Hellhound

Shee-It

This bitch be pimpin' my style!

Many Thanks to Lemonade Standhttp://kate-monsterr.tumblr.com/

Whatcha Starin' At, Mister?

Fuck off, ya bastard or we're callin' the cops.


Happily Pillaged From Retrogasm

Mommy, I Learned A New Word At School

That's very nice, Dear. But I would have thought they had taught you "cunnilingus" or "vulva" or something equally sophisticated by now.


Many Thanks to A 1000 Broken Dreams

Tough, Ya Little Fucker

Maybe that'll cramp your style for a few hours.


Many Thanks to Tack-O-Rama

Good As Is

Grates to Fuck Yeah, Dementia!

Just Don't Try To Sell It On The Front Lawn

...unless you want to get your little ass arrested.


Swiped From Tack-O-Rama

A Million Dollars, Muthafuckas

Or I start takin' down skyscrapers.


Klept From Tack-O-Rama

Mr. Bad Attitude

Much Obliged to Collected Letters of the Widow Flannigan

Sane Advice Doomed To The Shitter

-Josh, I really wanna hook up with you at like McDs' or you know some place cool, but I really have to run it by my Mom. 
-OMG, Katelynn, if you do that, she's not gonna let you come see me. That is so uncool. You don't need permission from your parents, grrrl. You're not a kid anymore, ya know. 
-Uh, yeah, I guess you're right. I trust you. Look, I can sneak out sometime when they have gone to a movie or somethin'. I'll text ya when it's all clear. 
-Alright, you are so together, I just can't believe how much for someone who is 13. We are gonna have a blast! 


Snatched From I Want To Touch Your Face

How Many Times Have I Told You

...not to play with your food, young lady.


Many Thanks to I Want To Touch Your Face

This One's Effing Good As Is

Much Obliged to I'll Tumblr For Ya

Look What I Drawed

Clark held it up to the sky. "See, it look just like the real clouds!"


Much Obliged to Eat My Crayola

You Put What In My Ovaltine?

Before she drank her glass of chocolaty goodness, Myrtle had been a fresh-faced, blond youngster. It was hard being the daughter of a mad scientist.


Via La Soledad del Disenador de Fondo

Habibi, He Is Arrived!

A Lebanese boy announces an appearance of the Prolapsed Uterus Fairy. It will mean extra pounds for the family because his grandmother has placed the organ under her pillow.


Much Obliged to No, You Shut Up

School Program Fail

For Johnny and Christine, the self-esteem raising program at school seemed to have a disastrously opposite effect.


Much Obliged to Bezembinder's Illustrated Links

Don't Worry, Mr. Patootie Head

We'll rest here for a second. We have to outrun the pound people. I can't go on without you, Tootie. Don't seize up, now.


Stolen From Sloth Unleashed

Awkward Situation

"Mommy, are you and Mr. Twerker having a slumber party? You should have invited Daddy, too."


Many Thanks to Trixie Treats

What?

"Would you rather they shit on us, Johnny?"


Grazie a Retro World

And You Thought Yours Were Little Monsters

Much Obliged to Kitschy Living